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Archives for July 2015

Buying The Ticket And Taking The Ride

By Frugaling 15 Comments

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Buy the ticket, take the ride

In The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Ben Stiller’s character races across the globe in search for an adventurer, played by Sean Penn. The ensuing travels take Walter on a psychological rush. Suddenly, his life is full of excitement and uncertainty. But before he jumps — takes that chance — Walter is stuck at the office. He’s afraid to leave. His life is a boring repetition of the same cycle of work.

Recently, I’ve noticed a similar dissension within me. While I enjoy my work immensely and have deep passion for helping others, this delayed gratification of graduate school prevents me from engaging in a fundamental, eye-opening experience: international travel.

Seeing another culture has been shown to aid in the development of empathy. Intuitively, that finding makes sense, as we often live blindly to those in difficult life circumstances. Immersive cultural experiences such as travel and reading help people become rounded.

Sign me up for the discomfort of having to negotiate a car rental without speaking the language. I’ll find a way. Sign me up to confront class differences between cultures and peoples. I’ll question my assumptions. Sign me up to try the exotic foods and push my boundaries. I’ll open my stomach and heart.

With these values and ideas in mind, I’ve been fantasizing like Walter Mitty. Days go by in work and writing, but I secretly imagine a getaway — daydreaming my way to Denmark, Egypt, France, Israel, and Russia. Sometimes I picture dropping everything and running; after all, we only have these moments. Each time I dream big, I slowly regain composure and repeat simple mantras: “must save, later will travel” or “must work, employer needs me” or “once I get my PhD, then I’ll travel.”

But moments of lust for flight keep hitting. Nowadays, the fantasy occurs every time I’m in an airport. If the flight is delayed, cancelled, or I’m flying standby, I look at Kayak.com for the cheapest flights to… anywhere. From hundreds to thousands of dollars, I wonder if I could just go — without fear or restriction.

One of my greatest regrets has been my failure to develop fluency in a second language. Travel could’ve aided in language acquisition. As a frugal person, I can’t quite afford it yet. I’m stuck on saving a little egg that can protect me and someday empower me to travel. I find that terribly frustrating.

My guess is many people are like me. We’re busy working away during the week and the money is helping us get by. If you’re more frugal, you can sock away a little more, too. We’re hardly rolling in the dough, though.

If we could cheaply travel, we would. And yes, there are ways to travel more affordably. You can get a credit card with a signup bonus, buy tickets well in advance, look for student/senior discounts when possible, stay at hostels, and travel light. But at the end of the day, travel requires time off work and savings. It necessitates a certain safety net, unless you’re willing to risk homelessness because of the desire to travel. And there are classes and cultures right here at home that cannot and will not travel — ever — despite whatever desire they have internally.

When my head and heart race, I slow down by remembering my consistent goals. I want to be able to provide for others, give healthily to charity, avoid nasty loans, save for retirement, and be prepared for an emergency. Travel will come, and as much as the daily drools of quotidian life will never appeal to me, I do recognize what I’m building here. Frugality is a philosophical aspiration where I realize that life can be grand with less. Eventually, I’ll buy the ticket and take the ride.

Filed Under: Save Money Tagged With: Class, cultural, cultures, empathy, fly, flying, international, ticket, Travel

Frugal Articles of the Week

By Frugaling 5 Comments

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Reading Nook Photo

I’m back with another terrific group of articles! Hope you enjoy and share widely.

How We Pay Ourselves First by Our Next Life
I’m a big fan of budgets, but if you struggle to make or stick with them, there’s another way to stay frugal. The authors at Our Next Life propose “paying yourself” first. That means taking the money out of the bank account, and out of your hands before you have a chance to spend it. It’s a great psychological trick and well worth a read.

5 Awesome Dates That Won’t Break the Bank by Elliott Bailey
Frugal dating has sometimes been a struggle. I’m always open to new ways to save. Elliott Bailey may have come up with five of the most unique date ideas I’ve seen. And the best part? They’re all frugal friendly!

How Much Is Your Time Worth? by Stefanie O’Connell
Time equals money; at least, that’s the old adage. I’ve frequently thought about that and realized that my “worth” varies according to my work demands. If I have more free time, I’m less valuable. If you’re a freelancer, this is a great question to keep in mind.

Emotions and Food: How to Deal by Laurie
Vulnerability surrounding food decisions is exceptionally admirable. Laurie acknowledges a past of eating mistakes. Now, she’s turned a new leaf: eating well and staying frugal. Props to her and her family!

Filed Under: Save Money Tagged With: articles, Budget, Budgets, dates, dating, Food, Frugal, time, week

Nonconformity Is Key

By Frugaling 29 Comments

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Hard at work, trying to be different.

I regularly workout in flip flops. On the weekends I tend to wear the same shorts and/or T-shirts for two or more days. I’ve had the same breakfast for nearly five years (some type of eggs and toast). I started cutting my hair in sophomore year of college — can’t remember if I’ve paid for a haircut since then. I hate dressing up for work. I don’t have a car, and regularly bike to first dates (Where’s your car parked? Oh, the bike racks over there!). I fantasize about stealing condiments of ketchup and mustard at a local fast-food restaurant. I’d rather enjoy a good book or the company of friends over crowds in a club. I tend to leave the AC off or, at least, at sweaty levels if I’m alone. Vice versa, I tend to freeze in the winter because my room is draftier than the rest of the apartment and I keep the heat low. I’ve been known to pick up grocery items and carry them throughout the store, and then dispense of unnecessary purchases on random shelves (I’m sorry store clerks).

When I was younger, each of these pieces brought me great insecurity. I purchased Under Armour clothing and paid careful attention to be appropriately attired to workout. I was terribly concerned with how I’d be perceived. I used to drive my car to dates, and pay for parking, gas, and all the depreciation in the process. It seemed customary to have and drive a car — the movies always featured the man picking up his date. Many of these examples started out as deep vulnerabilities, which spawned into consumption.

Then frugality hit me. With all of its messages and philosophical underpinnings, I felt this pull to save wherever I could. It worked. I started to save money and act more consciously about my spending. But like many moments in my life, I was insecure to broadly announce that I was frugal. I wondered how people would react.

Reactions varied across genders, ages, and populations. Some loved and admired that I was so “young” and looking to right my financial path. Others were defensive that I was looking to save, as if it said something about their own spending. They’d question just how frugal I was being, and whether I would continue. Doubt was pervasive at times — for me and the person listening. Could I continue frugality in the face of cultural assumptions of consumption?

I gained confidence in this new life by regularly reading websites such as Becoming Minimalist, Budgets are Sexy, and Zen Habits. Each website presented a minimal, simple life. The authors had removed themselves from many of our culture’s trappings. They wanted and professed the mantra of less.

While individuals’ reactions varied, there was consistency in my reading and writing. I found solace in their words and my writing. I could reflect on what this meant to me longer term. The broader picture I kept coming back to was a sense of modesty and necessity. I needed to live on less because I was born privileged, and many weren’t. Additionally, I was motivated to cut back to trim my student loans. These ideas provided a motivation beyond simply wanting to see more money in my bank account. I had no interest in amassing wealth.

Somewhere around then that confidence led to a loss of the previous insecurities. I embraced the weird. In the past, I may have held back with friends and dates. But I turned a new leaf and led with my new life. I’ve made do with less, which is transferable across domains of personal and professional work. There’s a grit that develops from going without.

Yes, I’m sweating profusely as I type these words. Yes, I risk dropping a free weight on my flip flops. Yes, I did bike to our date, and no there aren’t any pegs.

I’ve changed. At times, I’m countercultural, but at the heart is nonconformity. I’m sick of living within the carefully crafted bounds that others expect. Nonconformity has opened doors for me. My creativity has flourished in this time. By accepting a simple path, I’ve written and read more than ever for pure fun and enjoyment. It’s the greatest reward of this new life.

Filed Under: Minimalism, Social Justice Tagged With: countercultural, counterculture, Frugal, frugality, Insecurity, Nonconformity, Simple Living, Unique, Vulnerability, Weird

Why I Kept A Frugal Food Budget

By Frugaling 16 Comments

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Frugal Food Budget at Le Pain Quotidien Photo
My grandfather and I sharing a not-so-frugal, but delicious, meal after 6 months of meticulous calculating.

In January, I decided to engage in the most cliche thing ever: I created a New Year’s resolution. December had been jam-packed with semester finals, travel, and holidays. Throughout that busy time, I wanted to track my food expenditures. It was an expensive month, as food expenses climbed well over $400.

Admittedly, it wasn’t the first $400-$500 month for food. I was a notorious spender in this category. It was a weak point. With the rationale that “everyone needs to eat and spend money to do so,” I let myself off the hook. I wondered, “If I spend $7+ on a Subway sandwich, how much could I really save by making my own lunch?” I didn’t think I could save that much.

Something clicked over the new year: I suddenly knew I could do better. Moreover, that savings could be redirected towards investments and savings. With December’s balance calculated, I set an extreme goal for January: $200. That number would include food and drinks — anywhere, everywhere, and for any reason (e.g., even birthday parties and celebrations).

I reported my results and efforts for six months. Each month was less than December, and I got exceptionally close to $200 in February. I cut back on meats, dairy products, and consumed more rice than ever. After that restrictive month, I realized that $200 might be more ambitious than I originally thought. It was challenging to publicly share that “failure” to reach a stated goal. I’m not one to leave a goal unaccomplished. But in trying so hard to reach this number, I briefly lost the original purpose.

A more frugal food budget was never supposed to be painful. I never intended to eat only basic staples mixed with a few veggies for multiple meals a day. Regrettably, that’s what happened. While I was getting closer to the $200 number, I was definitely feeling the hurt of this lifestyle change.

Cutting back on my food spending was to live simpler, save more, and reflect on the change. Both at the start and now, as I write today, I can realize these goals. But I needed to get some perspective before I could actually analyze what I learned.

Before I committed to reducing my budget, I had little appreciation for how much each swipe cost my budget. A $7 sandwich, $8 burrito, and $15 dinner with tip all seemed strangely equal. It was sustenance. Why care about one purchase?

Meticulously tracking my spending and putting the receipts into spreadsheets changed this thinking. I could (with terror) see the cost. While individual purchases had been necessary, the total spent was alarming. Creating a formal food budget and tracking balances allowed me to feel, see, and read that disconnect. It was a game changer.

See, when I started this journey, I had no appreciation for the “feel” of a food budget. How many sandwiches can I get and still maintain my budget? How much fruit can I buy? Can I afford the sparkling juice? After I had calculated these totals, I realized what, for instance, a $250 food budget actually looked like.

Today, I can self-monitor and reasonably predict my monthly total. I know what I can and can’t buy — what will regularly put me over the edge. It took three stages to get here:

1. Track a balance for a month
2. Create and live with a new budget for 6 months
3. Pause and reflect on the new balance

Those three stages can be applied to any budget desired, but were 100% necessary for food. It took time to actually get the feel. I thought it would be easier, but old habits die hard. I’d recommend that if you want to revolutionize a budget that you carefully track yours for about 6 months, as well.

For your entertainment, I’ve conducted an interview with myself to reflect on the process:

Interviewer: Hi Sam, thanks for joining me today to talk about your frugal food budget!

Sam: Happy to be here.

Interviewer: So, did you ever reach $200?

Sam: Sadly, no. I got really close in February. Otherwise, I was able to keep it under $300 quite regularly.

Interviewer: What was the hardest thing about cutting back?

Sam: Eating out feels convenient. Heck, oftentimes it is convenient. And I love trying new restaurants! There is a powerful trade off though, and that comes in sacrificed dollars, and ultimately, more time spent working to afford a larger food budget. That’s the vicious cycle I want to avoid. I’d rather not have the convenience of eating out with additional work. It’s important to build relaxation into my schedule, and if I eat out too much I actually hamper that effort.

Interviewer: Interesting!

Sam: Very.

Interviewer: Could you do better next month?

Sam: You know, that’s a good question. Just because I’ve decided to end the regular reporting of my food budget doesn’t mean I’ve ended my own efforts to save. Frankly, I’m interested in living well, under $300 per month, and being able to have the freedom to go on the occasional date and get a drink with friends, while still saving about $200 more per month than I used to.

Interviewer: Yeah, but if you’re spending nearly $300 on food some months, are you really frugal?

Sam: Ugh, I hate that question. I’m a work-in-progress. I’m hardly perfect. Frugality is a philosophical journey, and in my mind, has no destination. There is no final frugal line or defining organization that sets standards. You are your own standard. I believe I’m far more frugal now, but could always do more to save. Frugality comes in the lack of contentedness. I don’t want to accept that I’m financially set; rather, I’m eternally under construction.

Interviewer: Phew! Thanks for spending the time today, Sam.

Sam: My pleasure.

Filed Under: Save Money Tagged With: Budget, Food, food budget, Frugal, frugality, Meals, spending

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