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4 Lessons From 3 Years Of Frugaling

By Frugaling 12 Comments

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Photo: Dustin Lee/Unsplash

Three years ago I sat at my then-girlfriend’s kitchen counter, which looked out at the Pacific Ocean. The panoramic window looked on beautiful condos and homes nestled along the California coast. The weather was perfect, and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky.

Amidst this perfection, my heart sank with the weight of tens of thousands of dollars in debt. It was something that could stand in the way of relationships, compromise my job prospects, credit scores, savings, investments, retirements, and giving to others. I wanted to excise the morass of debt, but didn’t know how.

I started writing Frugaling as an aspirant — a mere amateur in the financial planning world. What could I know about saving money, making money, and changing my prospects? While I didn’t have all the answers, I had hope.

I could never have predicted what happened next.

By cataloguing my story, sharing my triumphs and travails, and being open the entire way, I benefited financially and emotionally. The former included about $40,000 in revenue. Something that would allow me to pay off almost all my debt. The latter permitted me to regain my breath — to relax once more. I was able to let go of most financial uncertainty stress.

Three years of Frugaling flew by faster than I could have ever expected. It’s hard to fathom where I was then and now. Much has changed. Here’s what I’ve learned:

The rules don’t apply evenly across populations

We don’t all start from $0, the same educational prospects, families, or social networks. We aren’t all born the same race. We aren’t each afforded a $1 million loan from our fathers.

Finance, while personal, goes beyond “personal finance.” After writing for years, it’s clear both in comments, criticisms, and critical thinking that society has great power in affording people the opportunity to succeed.

Whenever we talk about financial management, we need to consider multiple stories — not just our own.

People care deeply about food concerns

Some of the most popular articles have been about food. And I don’t think it’s an accident. When people look at their budgets, one of the highest lines is for food.

Food is often an area where people look to cut back on. Maybe you eat out too much. Maybe you eat too much. Maybe you spend too much on coffees.

More importantly, any little change in your food spending instantly affects your total spend for a month. Reduce the regular visit to your favorite restaurant, make a meal at home, and you can immediately see the benefit to your wallet.

Simple living, minimalism, and frugality are deeply intertwined

If we imagined a venn diagram, these three concepts would greatly overlap.

Those who enjoy canning, meal planning, and living simply are usually following the frugal life, too. Minimalism directly affects budgets, too. Reducing the urge to fill closets, cabinets, and stuff the remaining areas can help you save money every month.

I’m inspired from each of these concepts. I read — mostly checking out books at the library. I cook (or attempt to) at home. And I constantly look for ways to reduce extra stuff and refuse impulse buys.

Debt can suffocate its victims

Swimming in debt made me struggle for air, space, and time. How long would I have to live this way? How long would I be able to negotiate this rat race? I felt choked by the burden.

Many live like this — even middle-income earners. One way or another they find themselves in great debt and/or living paycheck to paycheck — always on the precipice of a missed house payment, medical bill, or job loss. Every day is a struggle.

Debt has a sneaky way of controlling lives and forcing people to work more, save less, and reduce time spent with loved ones. Debt can impact marriages, relationships, and family members. And oftentimes, it’s inescapable until the final dollar is paid off.

These lessons have taken years to understand and conceptualize — to convey them today. I’m honored and humbled you’ve taken the time to follow along, read, subscribe, tweet, and share.

Cheers to another three years!

Your frugal friend,

Sam

Filed Under: Save Money Tagged With: anniversary, debt, frugaling, frugality, Minimalism, planning, saving money, Simple Living

Think Outside The Subscription Box

By Frugaling 22 Comments

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Think Outside The Subscription Box

“Show someone you care with a random box of stuff this holiday season.”
— CNNMoney

There’s Graze, Birchbox, Barkbox, Brobox, Dollar Shave Club, Trunk Club, Blue Apron, and now, there’s Minimalism & Co.’s new minimalist themed subscription box. Each box has their own flavors, qualities, and featured products. Some use corporate partnerships to market products through these boxes, while others are hand-selected items by the box creator. These subscriptions can include makeup, food, and much more.

The subscription model is usually set at one box per month, but this varies between companies. The prices range from $25 to $100s each month. If you’re using Blue Apron — a meal preparation service — you’ll likely sign up for more regular deliveries. Although, Minimalism & Co. sends their box once every quarter (3 months). Regardless, once you sign up, you’ll be getting regular deliveries of unexpected “gifts.” It’s like getting a surprise present each month!

However, there’s another way of looking at this subscription craze. To mindlessly subscribe and receive trinkets, makeup, and/or men’s grooming products seems to be the epitome of conspicuous consumption. It’s unclear who might need these products; I mean, truly need a product received through a subscription box.

Initial subscriptions are often discounted to make the first box free or inexpensive. Subscription services know that once they have someone on the trial, they’re more likely to continue using their product and/or try it again at a later date. And even if you were done with the service, you might not want to go through the terrible phone trees and/or automatic email exchanges to get your cancellation confirmed. All the while, you’re spending money, adding clutter, and struggling to cancel the onslaught.

Subscription boxes have made minimalism, orderliness, and frugality harder. Fortunately, there’s an alternative to this madness. Today, I want to introduce a solution to effortless consumption. In fact, I’ve come up with a clever name for the subscription, too: “ByeBox.”

Our worries will be solved. It starts with a nearly empty box. When you subscribe to ByeBox, you receive nothing but a cardboard box and a piece of paper. Isn’t that revolutionary and minimal!? And there’s no need to be careful when carrying the box into your house, as there’s nothing to break. Once you’ve opened up the box to see no goodies, makeup, razors, grooming products, or exotic foods from Chile, you can prepare for a far more intentional decision.

Written on the 8.5 by 11-inch paper is a simple request: “Pick something from your house that you once wanted/desired, but no longer find enjoyment or need. Place it in box and ship it back to ByeBox for another empty box!” It’s just that simple!

We are faced with countless opportunities to spend and collect every day. Surprisingly, many have embraced subscription boxes and taken to spending outsized proportions on tchotchkes that provide little value to our lives. My idea — ByeBox — might be a joke, but wouldn’t this make more sense to those working to live a minimal and frugal lifestyle? The harder decision always seems to be fighting against the mode of consumption — to find ways to minimize by going without and throwing out.

Filed Under: Minimalism, Save Money Tagged With: ByeBox, Conspicuous, Consume, Consumer, Consumption, frugality, minimal, Minimalism, subscribe, subscription box

10 Reasons You Should Become a B Student

By Frugaling 11 Comments

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Time and Clocks

My definition and intention with frugality has remarkably little to do with money. Rather, I’m motivated to save and protect time. Being frugal allows me time to read, write, and enjoy my time with friends — it’s not just about padding my bank account. With a lower cost of living, I can maximize my work-life balance.

As a Ph.D. student, I’ve been asked how I have time to “do it all.” Doctoral programs tend to be arduous and lengthy. But I usually blanche at this hyper work-focused “compliment,” which usually comes from peers and fellow colleagues. They look at my “accomplishments” and wonder the recipe. They quickly surmise it takes lots of time.

It’s not true and doesn’t accurately represent my values. Once I got into graduate school I threw away the perpetual drive for good grades and professor’s good graces. While I care about what they think, I’m not motivated to perform in the classroom. I don’t really care about essays or exams. My heart and efforts are always outside the classroom.

When I was an undergraduate student at Colorado State University, I realized A grades were very difficult to achieve. The plan often included late cram sessions, lost weekends, sacrificed social gatherings, flashcards, and fewer passions outside academia. Not only was I paying to be there, I was without time for anything but school.

To know what an A grade took also meant knowing what a B felt like. In college, the B is considered the new average. It didn’t feel like an option to “slack off” and shoot for Bs. But I knew that Bs were easier to receive and life became relaxed. I could get a B in almost any class with a bit of study and meeting expectations for essays. I didn’t have to stress and worry and struggle. It just happened. As soon as I entered graduate school, this new philosophy took hold.

Today, the answer is simple for my acknowledged “successes”: I’m a self-identified B student. For many of my peers it’s hard to let go of the control, academic achievement, and rigor for classroom activities. I can’t blame others, as we’ve usually spent about two decades in training and indoctrination. Doing anything less than stellar inside the classroom is tantamount to treason. Unfortunately, by failing to let go of this mentality, time is lost. It’s time to think about another, better way.

Here are ten reasons you should become a B student:

1. Develop a well-rounded life (and resume/CV)

In the academic world, a resume is called a curriculum vitae (“CV”), but the same general rules apply. Everything related to my studies (work, research, teaching, and clinical work), which will be used for future employment, is in this document. My CV serves as a history of involvement and diversity of activities. It says a little something about who I am and want to be perceived as. But my grades and GPA don’t represent me. In fact, I don’t even put my GPA on my CV. My goal now is to develop a well-rounded life. If beneficial experiences for future employment come around, perfect!

2. Participate in anything at the flick of a finger

Previously, I was held back when offered opportunities to participate. I remember all the way back to high school when I declined an opportunity to travel for a golf-team match because of a class conflict. School frequently came first. When I relinquished some of the focus and power on classroom materials, I could — without much concern — participate in activities that enriched my schedule and made me happy. Recently, a professor asked about serving on a committee and I immediately said yes. If it means a grade suffers, that’s an okay trade off.

3. Stay grounded with your friends

Academic endeavors never trump friendships and relationships. A class is for a semester, these people are (ideally) for life. Curiously, I think I believed this, even as an A student. I would stress over friendships while in class, and feel pressure upon leaving to study more. It was the vicious cycle. Now, friends are a huge priority in my life. Interestingly, with better, healthier friendships first, my grades got better. What strange logic, right?

4. Read for fun

In my second year of graduate school, motivated by the master note-taker, Tim Ferriss, I began tracking how many books I read. It was abysmal at first, but over the next few years it rapidly escalated. To lose myself in a good book is more powerful than a class could ever really be. It’s just me and the book — wherever we go. In the last three years, I’ve read 51 books — all while “achieving,” “publishing,” and getting fine recommendations from professors. And yet, it had nothing to do with grades. Intriguingly, like the preceding reason, my essay writing improved because of the reading. I can write faster and with greater clarity — all while maintaining a B average.

5. Brainstorm and cultivate new methods to earn

Remember how I said time is the key variable? Well, being able to renegotiate my academic schedule allows me to find ways to earn money, too. As a student for years, I cannot and do not accept the rationale that it’s okay to take on more debt to focus on academics. Instead, I redirect time gained from being a B student to endeavors like Frugaling. They’re passion projects, which hone my writing ability and have healthy income benefits.

6. Encourage creative thinking

Classrooms tend to emphasize rule-following, timeliness, intrinsic motivation, and rote memorization. And don’t get me started on the dry, pedantic, boring textbooks! I’ve rarely been encouraged to be creative within a classroom. Actually, I take that back… There was art class in third grade. But aside from elementary school, creativity has been stifled and discouraged. An essay has objective and traditionally strict expectations. The professors have grading rubrics. Staying and coloring within the lines is a must. By breaking out of the classroom mindset, I can draw, write, photograph, and participate in the world as I see fit.

7. Write for fun

I didn’t like writing when I was younger. Writing was associated with classwork. It was a chore and/or homework assignment. Writing never let me be free — it only asked of me. Then, as I stole back time, writing became a love. I process my thoughts, concerns, and inner debates in words. The words can be read back years later — providing an arc and timeline to my days.

8. Advocate within your community

I’m a firm believer in social justice. Essentially, social justice is about working to correct society’s wrongs. An example of this would be the recent advocacy for affordable housing that I worked on last semester. Vulnerable populations were being disturbed by rapidly escalating rental prices in the university/campus community in Iowa City. I felt like participating and providing a voice. My grades and classroom involvement waned. Those textbook readings and presentations didn’t much matter to direct action. I will never forget that advocating for others is far more important than an A.

9. Stop defining yourself by your grades

Grades used to represent my identity. To be an average or above average student wasn’t enough of a title. I was desperate for excellence. This drive for titles was an insecurity of mine. Without excellence, who was I? Was I a good enough student for graduate school, employment, etc.? What I learned is grades are terrible measure of a person. When I refocused my time, I lost unhealthy competition, sleepless nights before exams, and stress throughout the semester. Now, I’m defined by my actions around school — not in it.

10. Embrace the weekend

Whereas weekends used to be dedicated to studying and writing essays, now they are largely for recharging. I write for Frugaling on the weekends (usually). I read for fun on the weekends. I hang out with friends on the weekends. I run when it’s sunny on the weekends. All it took was the acceptance of the second letter of the alphabet: Mr. B.

Filed Under: Social Justice Tagged With: college, frugality, grades, Life, money, school, time, university

5 Ways Frugality Reduces Entitlement

By Frugaling 17 Comments

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Glacier Mountain in Colorado

When I used to drive, the roads seemed chaotic. Drivers would cut each other off, give a finger, and visually seethe with anger. Driving wasn’t my favorite activity, but I rationalized a “need” for a car. It would take me to work, school, and play. I had “real” reasons to have one.

I clutched onto this idea and would frequently feel deserving of a car, place on the road, and conscientious, obedient drivers. I’d get furious when someone stopped at a light for a moment too long or was slowly moving in a passing lane. Others were blocking my ability to drive swiftly, effortlessly, and calmly. They were the problem!

Embarrassingly, it wasn’t the only area where I felt a sense of entitlement. A few years ago, I remember complaining that making lunches was an inconvenient task. It took too long. I expressed a desire to be able to afford and not feel guilty about eating out more often.

And then there were all the times where I convinced myself that I deserved something special. My mind of would casually drift into complacency and I’d think, “Because of all my hard work I deserve a treat.” But did was I really entitled something extra, more, or sweet?

Sometimes these thoughts would border on narcissism. I was a special, important person – better than the rest. I’d expect others to conform to my norms and settle into my expectations. I was looking out for number one. I struggled to see what others were experiencing. Like a sudden smack over the head, frugality was a departure from entitlement. Over time, it helped me see my blindspots and grow. Here are five takeaways:

1. Learning to live modestly

As I pursued frugality, life became simpler and more modest. Slowly I built more savings, cooked more meals at home, and made more donations to others. I brewed coffee at home and found ways to get it free on campus. My shoes became more beat up and shirts developed frays. I learned to patch things and upcycle. I sold my car, and bought a bike.

2. Opportunities for self-reflection and growth

With every shift, I realized a different side of my personality. The whole world got a facelift – a beautiful reframe. My bike empowered me to see the city with a fresh pair of eyes. Without the normal trappings of “success” I could reflect on who I want to be as a person. In time, I realized great fulfillment in helping others.

3. Exploring long-term happiness over short-term “fixes”

By choosing this life, I consciously eschewed the easy routes for long-term happiness. Advertisements market a life of joy through possessions, beer, soda, and cars. Oh, the things you can buy to make yourself better! Finally, those words and images stopped working. I wasn’t compelled to go to the mall after seeing an ad, and I became more hostile when I’d see them.

4. Increasing patience with impatience

Before I changed my life, long lines were infuriating. There was an incompetence to everyone around me. The checkout person wasn’t going fast enough and the shopper had too much in the cart. Over time, lines became an opportunity to breathe and think briefly. Similarly, I developed patience with others’ impatience, anger, and entitlement.

5. Departing the rat race

Entitlement is a nasty, nefarious quality. Unfortunately, it can be very difficult to see. Someone usually has to say it to your face (someone did for me). Frugality has enabled me to look for qualities in myself and others that aren’t about how much they can buy. Another’s worth is no longer tied to net worth.

How have you changed since you embraced frugality?
What did you learn?
How might you grow if you suddenly lived more minimally and mindfully?

Filed Under: Save Money, Social Justice Tagged With: car, entitled, entitlement, Frugal, frugality, Happiness, mindful, minimal, modesty, rat race, Simple Living

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