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We’re Addicted To Square Footage

By Frugaling 11 Comments

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Minimalism in space

I live in a 900-square-foot, two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment. Each bedroom has a full bathroom, a closet, and area for a desk. The kitchen is relatively large with a dishwasher, stove and oven, large sink, washer and dryer, and full refrigerator. A living room hosts a couch, chair, table, and television. The ceilings are expansive and tall; not palatial, but more than necessary. Maybe it’s just my “phase of life,” but this space feels like more than enough. What more could I need?

At 27 years old, I make enough to live. My salary is just over $20,000 each year. I can’t really save much considering the costs of my education and ancillary costs, but I’m happy with what I have. There’s room for improvement, but as I look at my apartment and stuff, I can’t help but feel embarrassed by the relative opulence. Most of the world doesn’t have it this good. I have everything I need right now.

If I were married, the apartment would actually feel even larger, too. Currently, my roommate’s stuff occupies a solid half of the apartment. If it was just my partner and I, we would share the same space, and only need one bedroom. The other room could become an office, dayroom — whatever! Heck, it could be a walk-in closet for all I care!

Over 900 square feet, I would begin to feel the creep of growth — the push to fill space whenever emptiness is present. Whether it’s my philosophical values of frugality or minimalism or a desire to minimize my carbon impact, I’d hesitate to grow beyond these walls. They wouldn’t be necessary.

However, it’s important to consider whether my tendency toward extremism is getting the best of me. Could there be a time in life when 900 square feet might not be enough? Potentially. If I had a larger family or needed to make room for my parents or some other unique situation arose, I could see the need. But it would be temporary to expand to the need of others, not constant space for the rest of my life. I’d want to downsize again.

Last week, I was reading an article in The New York Times about couples who had moved decades ago into the suburbs surrounding New York City. Some had moved into large bungalows and McMansions to raise families, enjoy the slower life, and have more room to grow.

One family raised three children in a 2,400-square-foot home. For those struggling with math like me, that’d be 5 people — 3 more than my roommate and I. With about 500 square feet per resident, the house could probably be quite a comfortable location. When accounting for the size of the home, it doesn’t include off-site storage, yards, and/or storage sheds that can be added later.

Now, later in life and three adult children, this family is looking to downsize and move back to the city, culture, and bustle of Manhattan. Who can blame them, too? New York City is fun — there’s always something to do, eat, and see. But as that couple looked for locations, they came up empty. They said all they could find were “depressing,” “very small” places at 900 square feet.

My jaw dropped at the statement. I was shocked! Here I’ve been living in apartments of 900 or less square feet for about 4 years; yet, this couple was struggling to move into such a space. What was I missing?!

Here’s what I suspect:

  1. People develop and find a comfort in abundance. To downsize may be a reflection of lost class and status.
  2. There’s a fear of giving up and away. Some material goods might not keep us alive, but are still hard to part with.
  3. Despite a “couple’s” desire to downsize, there might be discrepancies. Making a move up, down, or laterally isn’t always mutually agreed upon in the relationship. Those contrasting aspects can prevent people from committing to a serious downsize.
  4. We reach an adaptational level, which sets a new normal. Anything less just doesn’t feel “right.”
  5. Surrounded by a culture of mass and materialism, it’s hard to buck that trend and go small.

The reality is smaller spaces are freeing for people young and old. Not having lots of material goods and space means you can vacation when you want, dig into more expensive cultures, and enjoy a break from endless chores. And more importantly, plenty of normal, average, everyday people live in small spaces with great efficiency (Just look at this couple who lives in a beautiful, 420-square-foot apartment).

For years, magazines, newspapers, and all other forms of media have stressed how wealthy people buy opulent homes. Tens of millions of dollars are spent to afford these palaces. From Bill Gates to Ellen DeGeneres, these homes capture our attention. Don’t we want to be successful just like them?

Rather than duplicate this display of status, we can choose another path. What if we looked for the smallest apartments or homes? What if we looked for less? What if we looked for tiny, modular apartments that move and shift to our needs? What if we gave up our cultural addiction to more stuff in favor the culture out there?

Filed Under: Minimalism Tagged With: apartments, homes, Materialism, Minimalism, real estate, Space, square foot, square footage, Stuff, Success

I Hate Being A Walking Advertisement

By Frugaling 35 Comments

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Beats Headphones On-Ear Red

Recently, my laptop pooped out. The four-and-a-half-year-old computer had been through thick and thin. I had traveled the country with it, and even dropped a glass of soy milk into the keyboard. It helped me create graphics, write graduate papers, and start Frugaling.org. The device was essential for my new book, too.

Not having a computer sent me in a tizzy. I needed one for nearly everything I do from work to play to school. My book wasn’t finished either, and I needed a dedicated computer for proofreading and formatting. Immediately, I investigated my options and surprisingly sold my old, broken one for a tidy sum.

My previous computer was an Apple. The laptop was reliable considering what I threw at it. In an effort to be frugal, I looked at Google Chromebooks. Unfortunately, certain academic and work responsibilities would necessitate a real computer – whether Mac or Windows.

Considering resale values, reliability, build quality, and my own knowledge base, I decided to get another Apple. Because it was “Back to School” season, the company had a special sale. Buy a computer, get an education discount, and receive a free pair of Beats headphones.

Regularly $200, the headphones would be shipped with the purchase. When I agreed to the payment options and clicked order, I planned to sell the headphones. They would ultimately lower the real purchase price of the computer.

I ravenously opened the boxes. Despite everything I preach about immaterialism and anti-consumption, my computer was a necessity. There wasn’t another way for me to write, publish, comment, and work on Frugaling. And I was lusting over the product.

Then, in another box, were the Beats headphones. I left the box sealed – brand new and ready for auction on eBay or sale on Craigslist. As the days ticked by, that unopened box stuck out like a sore thumb. It begged to be open.

So, I did.

As I ripped the shrink wrap and took the shiny headphones out, I felt this guilt. If I’m supposed to be frugal, am I allowed to own Beats headphones? Furthermore, can I truly afford them if my budgets are still so tight? The frugal friend on my shoulder said, “you can’t afford this.” The baller on a budget said, “maybe you can.”

When I put the headphones on my head, I looked in the mirror and saw Lebron James suiting up for his next basketball game. I was a walking, listening ad for Beats.

With their iconic lowercase “b” logo on either ear and a red cord dangling down, I was embarrassed. The look, fit, finish, and advertisement-like design bothered me. I felt like a hypocrite. How could I spout frugally inspired words and wear these?

The next day I took the headphones to school. Everywhere I went, people asked about them. In fact, someone in the Iowa City community who struggles with homelessness that I’ve interacted with regularly approached me.

He grabbed ahold and said, “Wow, nice headphones!”

When I heard that, I felt shame. How can I walk around with these bulky Beats that flash status in the face of those with less? How can I reconcile the decision to keep/accept flaunting $200 sitting on my head, while he struggles to find shelter?

In these moments, I think many people ignore this dissonance. They rationalize their ownership by stating that those with less get what they deserve. This is our capitalistic society working as it should.

For me, I balk at symbols of excessive wealth. These are unnecessary reminders of classism that pin rich against poor – privileged against disenfranchised. I don’t need to look like Lebron James walking to game time. Likewise, I don’t need to look like I’m better than anyone else – because I’m not.

But is there ever room for something like this in a frugal lifestyle?

What would you do? Would you keep the brand-assailing Beats headphones or sell them off?

Filed Under: Save Money Tagged With: Apple, Beats, Class, classism, Computer, Headphones, homeless, Homelessness, Income, Materialism, money, Privilege, Technology

Don’t Buy This Ad

By Frugaling 8 Comments

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Photo Christopher Michel/Flickr

Flip an axis, make millions

Vietnam, hippies, and the civil rights movement all fomented into a powerful decade: the 60s. Flowery colors exalted a message of happiness and love over war. The Baby Boomer generation entered the workforce in droves.

Profits were to be made, and companies were eager to snatch even small portions of this new market. The continued growth of suburbs spawned a movement towards independence via cars. At this time of great economic and scientific potential, one auto company, VW (Volkswagen), created one of the most iconic advertisements ever made.

Printed in black, bold lettering was the word, “Lemon.” And above the text was a classic VW Beetle. Lemons were unreliable cars, and the VW ad suggested that the company carefully screened out those cars. Only perfection would be accepted; or, as they stated, “We pluck the lemons; you get the plums.”

Turning a word on its axis and daring readers to read on was risky. The advertisement had the potential to make consumers think, “VW Beetle is a lemon.” If they stayed for the explanation, the ad became clear; subtly, they were suggesting that other companies don’t care about reliability as much. By using “lemon,” they capitalized and succeeded in selling significantly more cars. It worked.

How “don’t buy” becomes “buy more”

In 2012, another company took a big risk: Patagonia. The corporate and marketing teams noted that there was a growing movement towards sustainability. Encompassed in this trend were simple living aficionados, minimalists, and value-oriented consumers. These careful consumers wanted great quality in responsible packages.

This Patagonia’s niche for quite some time. They advertised fair-trade, organic, and environmentally friendly products. Sales were growing, but then they decided to bet the farm on one massive ad in The New York Times. With bombastic, bold text, they wrote, “Don’t buy this jacket.” Behind the text was a Patagonia jacket.

Underneath the ad, the company focused on five key words: reduce, repair, reuse, recycle, and reimagine. Every word was paired with a communal pronoun of “We.” It took everyone to reduce the carbon footprint, make the garments last, and find good homes for them after use. Patagonia seemed to be advertising that consumers take good care of the goods, and consider repairing them before throwing them away. All solid virtues.

These value-laden terms were inspirational to those who had suffered through The Great Recession. Because the company struck a chord with the current market demands, the company profited royally. After that advertising campaign, the company saw double-digit growth.

Ironically, that’s unsustainable. Double-digit growth, compounded repeatedly, would make the company larger than Apple in a few years. And never mind the horrible environmental costs that would be necessary to produce these garments.

Your values can become a manipulation tool

Nefarious. That’s the word that comes to mind when companies manipulate us through our values. The trick is subtle, and if you blink you’ll miss it.

For the aspirational types, there’s Gucci, Coach, and Louis Vuitton. For the trend setters, there’s H&M and Express. For the recreational, there’s The North Face, Columbia, and even Patagonia. Each brand is shaped by its consumers, but also shapes their consumers – the effect is bidirectional. In other words, we affect brands and they affect us.

If our values center on sustainability, kindness to the Earth, and repairing over ridding, a chicanery of sorts can be used against us. Without the brand awareness and heavy advertising, we could go to Goodwill or any other secondhand store for options. The clothing would be in fine shape or could even be repaired to return to like-new status. But we don’t, and there’s a reason why.

Corporations are powerful. Even the kindest ones can sway us from choosing another, more affordable option because they espouse “our” values. We like when we see our values portrayed in mission statements. We like that connection and feeling of being a part of something larger than ourselves. The brands fill that void. They provide a home for values.

So, should I buy that shirt?

Patagonia plainly states “Don’t buy this shirt.” Unfortunately, to those that connect with anti-consumption, anti-materialism, and minimalism, it’s hard not to foam at the mouth with lust for this company’s ad.

I love it! That’s the ad for me. It speaks to my heart. Despite the clear declaration to avoid purchasing their clothing, I can’t help but be intrigued and want to support them.

Subtly, the company is able to supplant a more frugal choice when the time comes to buy something. Goodwill doesn’t have the marketing budget of Patagonia, so the first reaction isn’t to shop there. But it’s more sustainable, frugal, and creates jobs for some of the most disenfranchised in the community. That’s a win-win-win, and it doesn’t cost us $80, $90, or $100.

To be clear, there’s nothing wrong with supporting companies that share your values. But know that this is a marketing trick, and when you choose VW or Patagonia after seeing that advertisement, it’s worked. They got you.

Filed Under: Social Justice Tagged With: ads, advertising, Anticonsumption, Clothing, Consumption, Marketing, Materialism, Patagonia

Why Trying To Be Happy Makes You Sad

By Frugaling 11 Comments

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Happiness of children
Photo: Geraint Rowland/Flickr

“Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.”
–John Stuart Mill

“Hose off before you come in the house!”

My brother stood there, covered head to toe in mud, shirtless and wearing an awesome grin. For the last few hours, we had destroyed my parents’ manicured backyard. With sticks and odd tools (we really needed a shovel), we carved into the grass and dirt until we had a small, 12-foot long canal of sorts. Then, we poured unknown quantities of water down our makeshift river. It was the perfect project for an unscheduled summer day.

When I think back to this moment, it’s easy to be nostalgic. Here, my brother and I worked tirelessly on a project without meaning or reason — just childhood fun. We both smiled back and forth, and were filthy by the end of it. It was a freedom that children seem to have that adults relinquish.

But happiness was an elusive quality back then. I know that during my childhood and adolescence, I felt sad much of the time. There were various factors influencing my sadness, but I know that internally something was off, too. I was desperate to feel “normal.” I was desperate for others to like me. Really, I was desperate to feel happy. Yet, I couldn’t be more miserable.

The media message of happiness

In the worst of moods, hardest times, and deepest depressions, all I wanted was happiness. It’s frequently been the mantra coursing through me.

The world around us says we deserve to be happy. Growing up, I had the unfortunate inclination and timing to enjoy shows like FOX’s The O.C. and MTV’s Laguna Beach. They each flaunted an inconceivable wealth and privilege.

They seemed happy, even in their dramas. It was an endless party for them, and I wanted in. The mundane aspects of life didn’t exist in these shows. Abnormally long bathroom routines, cooking breakfast, writing for hours, and listening to a lecturer drone on weren’t the focus of these “teenagers’” lives. No, the excitement was in the sex, fashion, and material wealth.

These shows helped craft a warped sense of drive towards income and status. Unfortunately, each step towards those goals made me more miserable. Happiness was eluding me.

Suppression of thoughts only causes more

Stop thinking about polar bears.
Stop thinking about polar bears.
Stop thinking about polar bears.

Have you stopped thinking about polar bears?

Oftentimes, to find happiness, people attempt to suppress thoughts/feelings of sadness. For short periods, individuals are able to say, “I’m not going to let myself feel sad.” And it sort of works. We can temporarily tell ourselves not to be sad. It’s just that over time we suffer from this forced suppression and rejection of feelings.

Researchers have consistently found that thought suppression doesn’t work longer term. What happens is that people frequently endorse an ironic “rebound effect” in feelings of sadness and are less capable at suppression later on. In other words, by forcing our natural emotions down and rejecting them, we do more harm than good.

“I’m just trying to be happy”

The consequences of our culture messages and thought suppression may be grave for both your happiness and budget. Oftentimes, people try to spend their way to happiness. Popular media spoon feed us a message that we deserve to feel this way, and that it is accessible through purchases.

When we can’t buy our way to happiness because our budgets are too tight, we feel sadness and unease. When we can buy material goods that are supposed to provide us lasting happiness (at least, that’s what the commercials suggest), we often continue to feel sadness and unease.

The traditional methods of “trying” to find happiness seem stale. There’s something wretched and moldy and overgrown. We’ve let corporate messages persuade us into thinking that Lexuses will make us better people, and in turn — finally — happy. We’ve let Coca-Cola re-brand itself repeatedly — most recently taking on the Internet and cleaning it up. We’ve let alcohol and tobacco companies objectify women to sell us drug-addled euphoria.

And yet, we’re still not happy.

Going with the emotional flow

I propose we smash these corporate-defined messages of success, achievement, and happiness. They’re not working for you, are they? Do their messages of pre-scripted happiness help? Do you watch beautiful people enjoy expensive goods and feel better about yourself?

If the solution was in our media, thought suppression, and material goods, we’d be the happiest people on Earth. Unfortunately, these methods don’t make us happier and they goad us into spending more money. There must be a better way.

As someone with a psychological background and soon to become a counseling psychologist, I hesitate to “prescribe” any one solution. We all come from different backgrounds, environments, and experiences. One size does not fit all, but I do have some propositions.

1. Change the end goal

Frequently, the reasons for saving, making, and spending money are aimed at satisfaction and happiness. It sort of sounds like, “I’ll be happy when I’ve earned a million dollars.” In framing our futures in this light, we’ve locked up an emotion for a later date. Until certain levels of wealth and material worth are achieved, people with these goals and ideals will experience emptiness.

It requires a certain level of mental flexibility, but if we can change the end goal, there’s hope for a better moment-to-moment life. Society says we should always be happy, but what will you say? Change the end goal to something like mental wellness and a fuller life may follow.

2. Learn to accept all emotions

As a counselor, I understand that many people grow up hearing these messages: “Stop crying,” “Cheer up,” and “It’ll be better next time.” Each of these negates the very real feelings beyond happiness that people might be feeling. They lay the groundwork for a life that will soon be happy — if only you’d stop being “weak.”

Life is not good or bad — happy or sad. When it’s boring or sad, we tend to spend more for excitement and happiness. It’s a self-medicated response that’s learned through the mass consumption of a culture that proselytizes this value.

Life is good and bad. There are swings of emotional highs and lows, and sometimes it’s boring and dull. That’s the real normal. If we can accept and think, “I’m sad right now, and that’s okay. At some point I’ll be happy again, too,” we’ll be better able to save.

3. Question anything that purports to provide long-term happiness

Hershey’s candy bars and BMW M5s can make us feel better. Likely, most of us have felt the joy of buying a treat. There’s this immediate headrush of excitement — from yum to zoom. But however much we might want it to stick around, it fades away.

Buying stuff is a short-term solution to long-term emotions. Feeling dull or down? Take a hit and buy something. Your immediate, short-term response will be happiness.

Instead, stay with it, don’t immediately try to “fix” your feelings. No purchase will ever solidify and halt emotional change forever.

Let’s define a new normal, where we accept our own and each other’s emotions — whatever they may be. Let’s recognize that no emotion is permanent, and that buying stuff should never be the long-term fix. Let’s learn to embrace the thoughts that scare us, because they’re only that — thoughts.

Filed Under: Minimalism, Social Justice Tagged With: buying, feelings, goals, Happiness, Happy, Materialism, Minimalism, Purchases, sad, sadness, saving money, Stuff, thought suppression

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