Tell me about successful people and you might be inclined to rattle off resumes. Perhaps these people work hard and make sizable sums of money. Maybe they are moving into multiple-thousand square foot homes with ample room. They could even have the prestigious title of doctor or chief executive.
In our highly individualistic society that hails “hard work” and “grit” and “responsibility” and “choice,” we learn early on what success looks like. Different cultures have variations of vocational prestigiousness, but many share in the desire to own land, property, and make more money than most. To be accomplished, one must follow this tattered path.
The ability to captivate through material possessions and titles is dangerous. Real success and accomplishment seems lost amidst this cavalcade of crap. Worse, these measures of success are not afforded to everyone. Minorities and those from disenfranchised backgrounds are not offered the same opportunities to “succeed” in these traditional ways. For example, faculty at institutions of higher learning are overwhelmingly white men, and that’s a problem for everyone.
Our ideas and definitions of success are decrepit. We need new measures, and we’re long overdue. If success cannot be afforded with greater equality, why do we continue to allow these narrow ideas to continue? What exactly are we doing with these antiquated ideals? Why do we trumpet individual achievement that only goes to consume and perpetuate inequities?
Society benefits in the propagation of materialism and consumption. And current measures of success conveniently fit this modality. Buy the home, buy a bigger one. Buy the car, buy a more luxurious one.
We need better, less financially dependent measures of successes. Education is out of reach for many. Material possessions are tired and tried methods of achievement. Income disparities are nearing Gilded Age levels again. Larger homes consume more fossil fuels to heat and cool. Luxury vehicles tend to burn through gasoline. And prestigious titles seem reserved for those born and ascribed status.
Just because “success” works for capitalism doesn’t mean it works for the collective. Let’s craft something a little different. Perhaps we can live in a world that defines success flexibly. Perhaps we can see success in the helping hand, time, and dollar given to anyone/someone in need. Perhaps we can see success in the mother that raises children who respect the planet and find ways to help others. Perhaps we need to break out from formal strictures that rule over our lives, and consider that consumption cannot equal achievement.
Disbanding this present thinking provides for a future with hope for the masses. Achievements needn’t be through prescribed methods and lists of prestigious professions. We need a world with janitors, plumbers, assistant to the assistant managers, and everything in between. We need a world where someone making $35,000 per year, retiring with little, but helping find foster homes for children is seen as a hero (and heck, would it hurt to pay that person a little more?).
Humans are incredibly creative; yet, we have allowed these to persist. We are flawed, but have great potential. It’s time to shed archaic messages. They were convenient for marketers, but harbored horrific messages to those who couldn’t meet the prescribed rules.
How would you define success? Who are your role models? What do you think about income, vocation, and education as measures of success?
kirsten says
Success is being able to do what you love (no matter the income). Success is meeting your goals – whether those are financial or not. I don’t necessarily look at material possessions as a measure of success. I know, in some cases, family $$ paid for the nice car or down payment on a huge home. Sometimes people max out lines of credit to appear successful with their material goods, but really they are steps away from bankruptcy. I focus on how happy the person is. I’ll ask questions like “how did you decide to get into this career”, fleshing out whether or not they love what they do or fell in to it or hot forced into it. It’s eye opening!
LizzyIngalls says
Thank you for another thought provoking article.
simpleisthenewgreen says
Being a minimalist at heart, I have a sort of aversion to stuff, so there is no way for me to ‘flaunt’ my status. However, when people hear that I have no car, no debt and no shopping habit, they see that living simply allows me the freedom that most people can’t fathom at 40 years old. I usually sense a bit of enviousness also. Not jealousy, but more like a change of thinking about their own life and status and stress. When you live simply, you don’t need a big salary or a big retirement account and you can work because you want to work, not because you have to. I can sit outside at a coffee shop for hours every afternoon because I have that freedom from ‘status’. I’m done with the corporate rat race where about 80% of my work was doing things that really didn’t make a difference. Now, I choose work and investing opportunities solely for the reason that I can walk away and say “I just made a difference in the world”, regardless of how much money I make or what my title is. This is my definition of success.
Emma says
I have a sister and two cousins. My sister and I got advanced degrees to work in social services. My cousins work in financial services. My aunt and uncle consider my sister and I to be failures,vwho wasted our intellect and time, while their kids are successful because they make 3 times as much as we do. Not surprisingly, I am not close to them, because we have such different values.
I love what I do and I see how people’s lives are better because of what I do. My finances may be very tight, but I am happy. I consider myself to be successful in life.
Nice Joy says
Great post
This evening I was little worried about my kids grades and lack of responsibility.
After reading this post I think that they will and should follow their interests. I should not make then struggle too hard to get better grades in the subjects that they are not interested.
I am a minimalist for a year and is challenging when you have kids.
year ago I was looking for ways to get a promotion, I had to do too many meaning less projects to get there . After finding minimalism I decided to do nothing that is not adding value or meaning.
I am happy where I am and glad that it get lot of support from bloggers like you.
Thank you Sam
pat says
I remember telling my children to ‘go to college, work hard and be successful, so you can make lots of money’. That was before the financial fall several years ago. It’s really not that way anymore, and I tell them now to just be responsible for themselves and go out into the world and do good. Even though they don’t have ‘prestigious’ jobs and fancy titles, they are happy with their lives. I try to show them you really don’t need alot to be content in this life.
thebrokeandbeautifullife says
My definition of success is always evolving. I definitely think those traditional things like income come into play, but most importantly it comes down to freedom- freedom of choice and freedom from restriction.
our next life says
Beautifully thought out and written, as usual. What if we can change the norm by serving as our own good examples of alternate success, and inspire those arlund us. Surely that will reach to larger and larger spheres of influence over time. The key is that we must stand strong and resolute in our own success, as defined by our own happiness and values, and not waffle because of societal expectations.
Dawn says
Having 4 children,I define success for them as being independent, responsible adults. Neither of my two oldest, ages 19 & 22 have ‘money’ nor are in college. But the 19 yr old is traveling the U.S. earning her way as she goes. The other is managing a private horse barn and living and raising my grand babies on her own(which I take them a lot). But she works hard every day with the horses and has her own apt. I consider them successful! They never call in to the ‘mommy/daddy’ bank and have even refused me giving a little money if it’s not their birthday or Christmas. I tell them all the time don’t go into debt, don’t borrow money cuz I myself have done bad financially. For now seems they are not making my mistakes. I am so proud of them!!! They are successful!!