Frugaling

Save more, live well, give generously

  • Home
  • Start Here
  • Popular
    • Archives
  • Recommended
  • Contact
  • Save Money
    • Lifestyle Downgrade
    • Save Money with Mindfulness
    • Save at Starbucks
    • Psychological Trick To Reduce Your Online Shopping
    • Best Freebies
  • Minimalism
    • 8 TED Talks To Become A Minimalist
    • We Rent This Life
    • Everything Must Go
    • Lifestyle Downgrade
    • The Purchase Paradox: Wanting, Until You Own It
    • Nothing In My Pockets
  • Social Justice
    • Destroy The 40-Hour Workweek
    • Too Poor To Protest: Income Inequality
    • The New Rich: How $250k A Year Became Middle Class
    • Hunter Gatherers vs. 21st Century Desk-sitters
  • Make Money
    • Make $10k in 10 Months
    • Monetize Your Blog
    • Side Hustle for Serious Cash
  • Loans
    • 5 Rules To Follow Before Accepting Student Loans
    • Would You Marry Me?
    • Should I Have a Credit Card If I’m In Debt?
    • $50k in Scholarships in 70 Minutes

10 Reasons You Should Become a B Student

By Frugaling 11 Comments

Share This:

Time and Clocks

My definition and intention with frugality has remarkably little to do with money. Rather, I’m motivated to save and protect time. Being frugal allows me time to read, write, and enjoy my time with friends — it’s not just about padding my bank account. With a lower cost of living, I can maximize my work-life balance.

As a Ph.D. student, I’ve been asked how I have time to “do it all.” Doctoral programs tend to be arduous and lengthy. But I usually blanche at this hyper work-focused “compliment,” which usually comes from peers and fellow colleagues. They look at my “accomplishments” and wonder the recipe. They quickly surmise it takes lots of time.

It’s not true and doesn’t accurately represent my values. Once I got into graduate school I threw away the perpetual drive for good grades and professor’s good graces. While I care about what they think, I’m not motivated to perform in the classroom. I don’t really care about essays or exams. My heart and efforts are always outside the classroom.

When I was an undergraduate student at Colorado State University, I realized A grades were very difficult to achieve. The plan often included late cram sessions, lost weekends, sacrificed social gatherings, flashcards, and fewer passions outside academia. Not only was I paying to be there, I was without time for anything but school.

To know what an A grade took also meant knowing what a B felt like. In college, the B is considered the new average. It didn’t feel like an option to “slack off” and shoot for Bs. But I knew that Bs were easier to receive and life became relaxed. I could get a B in almost any class with a bit of study and meeting expectations for essays. I didn’t have to stress and worry and struggle. It just happened. As soon as I entered graduate school, this new philosophy took hold.

Today, the answer is simple for my acknowledged “successes”: I’m a self-identified B student. For many of my peers it’s hard to let go of the control, academic achievement, and rigor for classroom activities. I can’t blame others, as we’ve usually spent about two decades in training and indoctrination. Doing anything less than stellar inside the classroom is tantamount to treason. Unfortunately, by failing to let go of this mentality, time is lost. It’s time to think about another, better way.

Here are ten reasons you should become a B student:

1. Develop a well-rounded life (and resume/CV)

In the academic world, a resume is called a curriculum vitae (“CV”), but the same general rules apply. Everything related to my studies (work, research, teaching, and clinical work), which will be used for future employment, is in this document. My CV serves as a history of involvement and diversity of activities. It says a little something about who I am and want to be perceived as. But my grades and GPA don’t represent me. In fact, I don’t even put my GPA on my CV. My goal now is to develop a well-rounded life. If beneficial experiences for future employment come around, perfect!

2. Participate in anything at the flick of a finger

Previously, I was held back when offered opportunities to participate. I remember all the way back to high school when I declined an opportunity to travel for a golf-team match because of a class conflict. School frequently came first. When I relinquished some of the focus and power on classroom materials, I could — without much concern — participate in activities that enriched my schedule and made me happy. Recently, a professor asked about serving on a committee and I immediately said yes. If it means a grade suffers, that’s an okay trade off.

3. Stay grounded with your friends

Academic endeavors never trump friendships and relationships. A class is for a semester, these people are (ideally) for life. Curiously, I think I believed this, even as an A student. I would stress over friendships while in class, and feel pressure upon leaving to study more. It was the vicious cycle. Now, friends are a huge priority in my life. Interestingly, with better, healthier friendships first, my grades got better. What strange logic, right?

4. Read for fun

In my second year of graduate school, motivated by the master note-taker, Tim Ferriss, I began tracking how many books I read. It was abysmal at first, but over the next few years it rapidly escalated. To lose myself in a good book is more powerful than a class could ever really be. It’s just me and the book — wherever we go. In the last three years, I’ve read 51 books — all while “achieving,” “publishing,” and getting fine recommendations from professors. And yet, it had nothing to do with grades. Intriguingly, like the preceding reason, my essay writing improved because of the reading. I can write faster and with greater clarity — all while maintaining a B average.

5. Brainstorm and cultivate new methods to earn

Remember how I said time is the key variable? Well, being able to renegotiate my academic schedule allows me to find ways to earn money, too. As a student for years, I cannot and do not accept the rationale that it’s okay to take on more debt to focus on academics. Instead, I redirect time gained from being a B student to endeavors like Frugaling. They’re passion projects, which hone my writing ability and have healthy income benefits.

6. Encourage creative thinking

Classrooms tend to emphasize rule-following, timeliness, intrinsic motivation, and rote memorization. And don’t get me started on the dry, pedantic, boring textbooks! I’ve rarely been encouraged to be creative within a classroom. Actually, I take that back… There was art class in third grade. But aside from elementary school, creativity has been stifled and discouraged. An essay has objective and traditionally strict expectations. The professors have grading rubrics. Staying and coloring within the lines is a must. By breaking out of the classroom mindset, I can draw, write, photograph, and participate in the world as I see fit.

7. Write for fun

I didn’t like writing when I was younger. Writing was associated with classwork. It was a chore and/or homework assignment. Writing never let me be free — it only asked of me. Then, as I stole back time, writing became a love. I process my thoughts, concerns, and inner debates in words. The words can be read back years later — providing an arc and timeline to my days.

8. Advocate within your community

I’m a firm believer in social justice. Essentially, social justice is about working to correct society’s wrongs. An example of this would be the recent advocacy for affordable housing that I worked on last semester. Vulnerable populations were being disturbed by rapidly escalating rental prices in the university/campus community in Iowa City. I felt like participating and providing a voice. My grades and classroom involvement waned. Those textbook readings and presentations didn’t much matter to direct action. I will never forget that advocating for others is far more important than an A.

9. Stop defining yourself by your grades

Grades used to represent my identity. To be an average or above average student wasn’t enough of a title. I was desperate for excellence. This drive for titles was an insecurity of mine. Without excellence, who was I? Was I a good enough student for graduate school, employment, etc.? What I learned is grades are terrible measure of a person. When I refocused my time, I lost unhealthy competition, sleepless nights before exams, and stress throughout the semester. Now, I’m defined by my actions around school — not in it.

10. Embrace the weekend

Whereas weekends used to be dedicated to studying and writing essays, now they are largely for recharging. I write for Frugaling on the weekends (usually). I read for fun on the weekends. I hang out with friends on the weekends. I run when it’s sunny on the weekends. All it took was the acceptance of the second letter of the alphabet: Mr. B.

Filed Under: Social Justice Tagged With: college, frugality, grades, Life, money, school, time, university

Being “The Best” Made Me Miserable

By Frugaling 13 Comments

Share This:

Pale Blue Dot Planet Earth Photo From Moon

Growing up, I wanted to be “the best.” Whether it be a pilot, firefighter, or investment banker, I needed to be the best. I was compelled to be better than the rest – always wanting and seeking hierarchical successes.

I competed over grades in school. Another’s “A” threatened my goals. Before I got into graduate school, I ruthlessly pestered professors with questions and looked for ways to improve my final scores. But I couldn’t compete in the hard sciences (i.e., chemistry, physics, and biology).

I purchased designer clothes like Diesel that were more expensive than others could afford. A sweater that cost over $125 was seen as a necessary cost to stand out. But secretly, I couldn’t afford them either — there were tens of thousands in student loans.

I played poker with my friends, and wanted to make more money than they ever could. First place was a sweet spot, and I reveled in knocking them out of the tournaments. But I lost money more often than I’d like, and felt ethically miserable when winning their money.

I wrote articles that were published in various journals and newspapers. My words created conversation and controversy — exactly as intended. But I saw writers my age publishing in Rolling Stone and massive online news sites. There were others publishing books, when I could merely squeak out 700-word columns.

I pictured running marathons with packs of people behind me. I imagined passing more and more people. But when I ran them, thousands finished before me.

My younger years were filled with the pressure to conform and my budget hurt because of it. Each time “the best” motivated me, I spent more money, competed in unhealthy ways, and looked for ways to put people down.

When I look back at my childhood, I realize how susceptible to American exceptionalism I was. My country was “the best” — better than the rest. And I needed to be a player in that world. I wanted to be a patriot and represent my country, as another best.

Eventually, I got burned out fighting to be the best; then, something powerful happened. In relinquishing this drive, I discovered that there’s always someone better than me (or you). There are nearly 7 billion people on this beautiful globe. Talent, expertise, and “the best” is everywhere you look.

As I let go of this need to be the best, I embraced another emotion. It was something like peace combined with acceptance. But not about being lesser than. It sounded like, “I’m okay as is, and I’m happy doing my personal best.”

There was a secondary consequence of letting go of my compulsion to be the best. My spending plummeted.

I stopped spending as much on food and travel. I sold my car, and got rid of hundreds of dollars in monthly costs associated with ownership (from gasoline to insurance to maintenance to car loan payments). My clothing costs fell, and are nearly $0 every month.

Ironically, I felt healthier and saved more money than ever. The buzz of inadequacy that had promulgated my inner voice quieted. I started to feel comfortable and humbled — happy to be me.

Consumption and affordability are warped and twisted by our drive to be the best. Imagine what your life would be like if you stopped competing with others reputations and talents. It influences everything about our lives.

What if we throw away this cultural norm and embrace who we are today? Would the brand new blazer or dress be as important? Would we finally be happy?

Filed Under: Minimalism, Save Money Tagged With: Budget, earth, grades, marathons, Minimalism, money, spending, the best

Follow

  • Facebook
  • Google+
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Subscribe

Best Of

  • The New Rich: How $250k A Year Became Middle Class
    The New Rich: How $250k A Year Became Middle Class
  • 5 Tricks To Save Money At Starbucks (Updated)
    5 Tricks To Save Money At Starbucks (Updated)
  • Destroy The 40-Hour Workweek
    Destroy The 40-Hour Workweek
  • 10 Reasons You Should Become a B Student
    10 Reasons You Should Become a B Student
  • The Real Reason Poor People Can’t Save
    The Real Reason Poor People Can’t Save
  • What Are The Best Sites For Freebies?
    What Are The Best Sites For Freebies?

Recent Posts

  • How To Find A Reliable Service Provider For Currency Exchange
  • First-Time Landlord: Know Your Rights to Protect Yourself from Bad Tenants
  • Increase Your Revenue Simply by Being a Great Manager
  • How to Earn Extra Income During the Lockdown
  • 4 Ways That Residential Replacement Windows Will Help

Search

Archives

  • January 2021 (2)
  • December 2020 (2)
  • October 2020 (2)
  • September 2020 (1)
  • August 2020 (3)
  • June 2020 (1)
  • May 2020 (2)
  • April 2020 (1)
  • February 2020 (2)
  • January 2020 (1)
  • December 2019 (1)
  • November 2019 (5)
  • September 2019 (4)
  • August 2019 (1)
  • June 2019 (1)
  • May 2019 (1)
  • April 2019 (1)
  • March 2019 (3)
  • February 2019 (1)
  • January 2019 (3)
  • December 2018 (1)
  • September 2018 (2)
  • July 2018 (1)
  • June 2018 (2)
  • May 2018 (1)
  • April 2018 (5)
  • March 2018 (6)
  • February 2018 (4)
  • January 2018 (1)
  • December 2017 (10)
  • November 2017 (3)
  • July 2017 (2)
  • June 2017 (5)
  • May 2017 (2)
  • April 2017 (8)
  • March 2017 (4)
  • February 2017 (3)
  • January 2017 (2)
  • December 2016 (2)
  • November 2016 (4)
  • October 2016 (2)
  • September 2016 (1)
  • August 2016 (4)
  • July 2016 (1)
  • June 2016 (3)
  • May 2016 (3)
  • April 2016 (4)
  • March 2016 (5)
  • February 2016 (2)
  • January 2016 (2)
  • December 2015 (3)
  • November 2015 (5)
  • October 2015 (5)
  • September 2015 (4)
  • August 2015 (6)
  • July 2015 (8)
  • June 2015 (6)
  • May 2015 (14)
  • April 2015 (14)
  • March 2015 (13)
  • February 2015 (12)
  • January 2015 (15)
  • December 2014 (10)
  • November 2014 (5)
  • October 2014 (6)
  • September 2014 (7)
  • August 2014 (12)
  • July 2014 (11)
  • June 2014 (12)
  • May 2014 (16)
  • April 2014 (13)
  • March 2014 (13)
  • February 2014 (9)
  • January 2014 (20)
  • December 2013 (9)
  • November 2013 (18)
  • October 2013 (15)
  • September 2013 (11)
  • August 2013 (11)
  • July 2013 (27)
  • June 2013 (18)
  • May 2013 (16)

Best Of

  • The New Rich: How $250k A Year Became Middle Class
  • 5 Tricks To Save Money At Starbucks (Updated)
  • Destroy The 40-Hour Workweek

Recent Posts

  • How To Find A Reliable Service Provider For Currency Exchange
  • First-Time Landlord: Know Your Rights to Protect Yourself from Bad Tenants
  • Increase Your Revenue Simply by Being a Great Manager

Follow

  • Facebook
  • Google+
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Copyright © 2021 · Modern Studio Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in